-- By Tom Phillips
My wife is a Presbyterian minister, the solo pastor in a thriving, active suburban church. Many days she comes home from work in late afternoon, then heads out again across theGeorge Washington
Bridge for an evening meeting. My job is to keep her nourished, healthy and
happy, and let her know how much she is loved and appreciated at home. All this can be accomplished with a delicious
home-cooked dinner, dished up on time. I
take this as a duty and a delight, in the spirit of the woman who taught me
most of what I know about cooking, and who blessed our marriage from the
beginning, in more ways than she knew.
After the wedding, my relations with Brigitte became strained. Debra was in her last year atYale Divinity
School , and living in New
Haven half the week.
When she was gone I would often go to Brigitte’s for dinner, but
Brigitte was not happy to see me; she took it as a sign of trouble in the
marriage. Finally I told her “Debra says
hello,” and she gasped with relief.
“Then you’re still together?” she said.
Of course, I said, and explained the whole situation, including that
Debra often cooked for me at home. But
it was never the same between us; for her it was always strange for a married
man to be dining alone in a restaurant.
My wife is a Presbyterian minister, the solo pastor in a thriving, active suburban church. Many days she comes home from work in late afternoon, then heads out again across the
If you think I’m talking about my mother, you couldn’t be
more wrong. She hated to cook, and never learned how. “Food is fuel,” she fumed, refusing to put
any more than minimal thought and care into her meals. No, the woman who taught me was Brigitte
Catapano, proprietress of Chez Brigitte at 77½ Greenwich Avenue ,
the smallest restaurant in New York ,
where I dined alone most evenings in the 1970s.
Separated from my family and in the throes of divorcing, I
lived alone in Chelsea , and worked
long hours at demanding, often crushing jobs in TV news. Escaping after the evening news at 7, I would
hurry downtown, breeze or stagger into Brigitte’s and crumple gratefully onto
one of the six stools at her counter. “Bon
soir,” she would say, looking genuinely happy to see me again.
The sign on the wall said “Chez Brigitte will seat 250
people, 11 at a time.” Besides the counter there was a back row of five stools,
facing away, but this was strictly for the overflow. The place to be was up front, where you could
watch Brigitte prepare your dinner, and learn the secrets of her cuisine
soignée.
For Brigitte, soignée meant carefully prepared, hovered
over, infallibly perfect. My
favorite was filet de sole meuniere, dusted with flour and sautéed in butter. Brigitte never missed – the fresh fish was always
crisp on the outside, soft and flaky within. She never missed because during the five minutes it took to cook, she
watched it with the intensity of a cat stalking its prey. She poked, listened to it sizzle, sniffed as
it began to steam, flipped it at exactly the right instant, and then a minute
later scooped it onto a waiting plate, still cooking, steaming and wafting its
fishy, buttery fragrance across the counter. A dollop of vegetables, potatoes or rice, a splash of fresh lemon and a
sprinkle of parsley and Voila! with an air of mastery and triumph, she laid it on
the counter before you. Another perfect
filet de sole, one in an endless series. Bon appetit!
I didn’t try to make friends with Brigitte – she was usually
busy enough, and I was in awe of her. But to my surprise she seemed to take an interest in me. One night when the place had momentarily
cleared out, she asked me to tell her my life story. My life was such a ruin at the time that I didn’t
know what to say; I mumbled something to the effect that I was just an
average Joe. But she didn’t give up. After that, instead of asking questions, she
studied my face like a fortune teller, looking for clues. “You’re English, right?” she opined one
night. Surprised, I admitted that I had
lived in England
as a child. “I know,” she said
triumphantly, “I am witch!”
Brigitte told me her life story. She was from Marseilles ,
a young wife and mother when her husband was killed in World War
Two. After the war she and her daughter
made their way to New York , where
she worked and eventually scraped together enough money to open a little French restaurant. Brigitte never remarried. She said she was “purified” by her widowhood
and hard work. Her daughter married,
moved to Florida and had children
of her own.
She gave me tips on how to eat, and live. Sleep without a pillow, she said.
If I asked a woman out, I took her to Brigitte’s for
dinner. If Brigitte didn’t like her, she
said nothing. If she did, she would gush
with compliments the next time I came in. Eventually I found the woman I loved and was willing to
marry, though she held me off for years. The first time I invited her to my house I cooked filet de sole a la
Brigitte. Later I brought her to
Brigitte’s and boasted about it. She
seemed surprised that I would imitate her cooking. But she liked my date. “She speaks very good English!” she
said.
When we married in 1979, Brigitte bought us a wedding present, a
set of small dishes from Germany, with a still-life pattern of apples, nuts, and cherries. When I
looked at the back side, I was surprised to see the brand name “Debra.” That was the name of my bride-to-be. “I know,” she said. I am witch!”
After the wedding, my relations with Brigitte became strained. Debra was in her last year at
Brigitte had fulfilled her role. She fed me and cared for me
when no one else seemed to, and nurtured me through the hardest period of my
life. She had kept me going, and now it
was time for me to move on. It was time for her, as well. Brigitte retired to Florida
sometime in the 80’s to be with her daughter and grandchildren. I wrote her a letter, but never heard back. She died in 1994. Chez Brigitte kept going but it was never the
same, and it closed a few years ago. The
last time I looked, 77½ Greenwich Avenue
was a Tasti-Delight.
Plates don’t last forever in our house, especially when our
three daughters were growing up. But I
deliberately put one of Brigitte’s wedding gifts aside, and it holds a place of
honor in our kitchen cabinet. To me,
this modest piece of provincial flatware stands for cuisine soignée, for
motherhood and purity, for la belle France, the tragedy of war and the courage
of an intrepid immigrant. And she
lives, in every dinner I dish up for the ones I love. Bon appetit!
Love this! So glad I got to go once before it became a Tasti-Delight...
ReplyDelete-Cassie
This is a beautiful tribute, Tom. Thanks for this lyrical picture of your life.
ReplyDelete